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Thursday, June 30, 2022

The 11 types of people you meet at Finnish Startup events

We’ve been thinking too much about events lately, and decided to buzzfeed together a post about the type of people you see at every Finnish startup event. Have any more suggestions? Let us know in the comments.

1. Finnish Game Dev

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– Used to work at Rovio (previously at Digital Chocolate)
– Wearing hoodie from current game company
– Working on F2P character-driven iPad game
– Carries stick to beat away investors

2. PR/marketing warrior

– First hire at startup
– Will only talk about startup disruption in buzzwords
– confides in secret that they don’t understand what company really does

3. The Ex-Nokian

– Easily spotted by sweater over button-up shirt, blue jeans, casual leather shoes
– Basically continuing old project at Nokia on their own
– carries both a grudge and a N9

4. The introverted inventor

– Stares at feet
– Mumbles Finglish
– Amazing product, probably the only talented person in the room
– Will be the drunkest at the after-party

5. The Bureaucrat

– Helping run some government program
– Has either a line of entrepreneurs waiting to kiss their ring, or totally avoided depending on how much funding they control.
– Most content and well-rested person in the room

6. Lapland Power CEO

– From somewhere above Helsinki’s outermost ring road
– has a 90’s style company name like Valosoft Oy
– Introduces himself as CEO and Chairman of the Board

7. The Press Bum

– there to eat free food and work on other articles in the press room
– will knock out interviews in 10 min, show up again at the after party

8. The AaltoES kid

– Walks around like a 20-year-old with a €1 million+ yearly budget (half of which will be spent on Estonian beer)
– Slush sweatshirt
– Thinks “startup life” means a free trip to Silicon Valley

9. The “Sweat Equity” Investor

– Ex-Nokian
– No actual cash for investment, but likes idea of investing “time and connections” instead of applying for a job like a normal person.

10. Demo Booth Zombie

– Has repeated same pitch 300 times that day
– Dead, blank eyes.
– Diet consists mostly of coffee and demo booth candy

11. Startup Groupie

– Intern
– Bubbly passion for the startup scene
– Hangs onto anyone mentioned in TechCrunch
– sign of the funding apocalypse

Photo – Daniel Schildt

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